Funny Ways Of Coping: The Use Of Humour In Counselling

Amongst psychologists and the like, humour has generally been recognised as an effective coping mechanism and a sign of good mental health. It often serves as a mechanism for releasing tension. As a child or adolescent, I remember seeing a television report on the news showing a man pushing his car through flood waters and a "friend" passing by in a four wheel drive leant out of his window and said, "See mate. I told ya you wouldn't be able to get it started if you flooded it!"

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In the counselling room however, making light of things is usually a very bad idea. It is primarily a serious business and people are not in the habit of attending counselling so that they can have a few laughs! Having said this though, in my more than sixteen years of experience as a counsellor, there have been a few occasions when clients and I have been in stitches with tears of laughter streaming down our faces.

If asked if I believed humour was important or necessary as a tool in counselling, I would say no. This is because humour is simply one of many resources any person may have at their disposal. Often I will have a discussion with clients about defence mechanisms and say, "We all have them and we all need them. If we didn't, we would be blithering messes on the floor and we wouldn't cope with life." I go on to explain that people can choose to utilise healthy ones (assertiveness, boundary setting, etc.) and unhealthy ones (aggression, addictions, etc.). Then I'll explain that some of them lie in between and I talk of humour as being a good example.

Unhealthy humour tends to take on a nature of being perverse, cutting, cynical, belittling or avoidant. It may include the defence of turning everything into a joke and not being able to be serious at times, too. In contrast, healthy humour tends more towards being creative, witty, empathetic and includes observations around the human condition, for example, incongruities and misunderstandings.

Much of counselling involves assisting people to get in touch with and develop their resources to deal with issues and people's resources tend to fall into five categories being Spiritual, Social, Practical, Physical and Psychological. Humour is part of the latter and can be very effective when integrated with the rest. It's not essential but can be great fun!